A Few Good Men

I love Tuesdays, because these are the days I get to fulfill my secret wish to watch the Bachelorette episode online from Monday night. But geez. I don't remember this much weirdness at the beginnings of any other season I've watched. (Please excuse me, as we are now entering Girlville).

STAYING
Brad - Something about him just makes me think CREEPER. He was really into that whole "I'm the brain, Wes is an idiot" thing (which I don't like Wes either, but come on now). His smile is creepy. I wish he was going home.

David - Really? I hope he explodes in front of Jillian one time so she can see how epically angry he is. Swearing is just not attractive, and I think it's really hilarious that Juan can incite so much conversation from him (he's not even talking about Jillian anymore). He just can't get past him. GET OVER IT & GET OUT.

Ed - Yay!!!!!!!! What a cutie!!! I am so excited to see their one-on-one date next week. He's mature, reasonable, and not ugly. Woohoo! I want to know more about him!

Jake - YAY!!!! I was so psyched he got the one-on-one this week. I think he is fabulous (and just so everyone knows, I totally thought so the premiere episode too, haha). The date seemed to go great, he was totally cute and kind and gentlemanly (except that surprise kiss... I still can't decide if that was ok or not). I hope he goes all the way. !!

Jesse - I don't remember anything about him. I think this is a sign.

Juan - Ok, I don't really understand what the big deal is. I mean, I *guess* I can see how some guys would have an issue with him (though no excuses for the size of Dave's issue with him), but I kindof like him. I think he's a cutie, and the fact that he's older only shows that he's in it for reals. I don't think that because he's not the manliest man on the planet is necessarily a bad thing... Argh. Usually I'm good at suspecting those fake woman-eaters, but I can't tell this time.

Kiptyn - I thought he was nice, but nothing amazing, especially when Jillian said she didn't even care what they said, she just wanted to make out with him. Um, NO. You are not looking for a NCMO, you are looking for a soulmate. Yes, he's a nice guy, but she better nip this in the bud before it turns into one of those Graham things from DeAnna's season. So sorry, Kippy, but you need to go.

Mark - Who are you? When Jillian called your name, I didn't even recognize you when you walked down to get the rose.

Michael - Not my absolute favorite, but I think he's a nice guy, even if he is a little exuberant and perhaps not the most mature or in control of himself. I think he's mostly funny, so I hope he sticks around.

Mike - Ok yeah, that whole Speedo thing seemed totally out of character for you. But that's cool, you got more than one side. I can handle that. Not my cup of tea, but we'll see with you. P.S. Not to be rude, but I think you are a better looking version of Julien, so I am glad he went home because at first I thought you were the same person, but now I've realized you are not.

Reid - Aww!!! I think he's cute, and boyish. Plus he's my sign (ok, that really has nothing to do with this). I didn't know who you were, but I'm excited to see a little bit more of you. Maybe Jillian will do something special for your birthday...

Robby - That toothpicking thing was pure skill, and I'm proud he handled that whole Wes-is-a-jerk thing really well. I'm also proud of Jillian for keeping him around, and I hope you do more awesome things in the future.

Sasha - This episode he just seemed to be chilling. So I'm glad next one he will have a one-on-one to really show his stuff. He seems nice, though.

Tanner F. - Who are you and what did you do this episode?

Tanner P. - He actually looks like Graham, I think. And while I think the foot fetish thing IS weird, it's not a big deal. Like, you can get over that. It was uncomfortable when he picked up Jillian's feet and started talking about them, but other than that one slip-up I think he's an ok guy.

Wes - EW. OH MY GOSH GET AWAY NOW. You are so annoying and rude and I don't think you are even attractive. You should leave. Now.

GOING HOME
Brian - I'm glad Jillian has sense somewhere. Goodbye, fool.

Julien - I mean, he was ok, but as I said about Mike, I'm glad one of them went home so I could tell them apart. Sorry it had to be you, J-man.

Mathue - Ok, that was kindof sad. I don't feel like he was really huge or anything, but it was touching and cute when he was sad during his exit interview. He'll find a good girl.

Simon - I feel bad, but I'm glad he realized the benefits of leaving now instead of later if it wasn't for reals. He was a nice guy. And had an English accent, which is always a plus.

Till next week! (Go Ed!!)