Bosom Friend

I've never really had a girl best friend. When I was in elementary school, and it was cool to have best friends, I would always say it was one of my friends who had moved away, so no one would feel bad it wasn't them (or be able to refute my claim). In middle school it didn't matter as much, but in high school I had some friends who came pretty close. I knew plenty of people and had many I was friendly with, but they always had another friend who was even bester than I. They always called someone else to gossip about boys or share their secrets with.

I don't know what I did wrong. But I do think it's a natural longing in everyone to be someone's one and only. This shows itself in marriage and dating relationships, but I think the more overlooked and under-appreciated is the one and only best friend; the "bosom friend," as Anne Shirley always said.

"A bosom friend--an intimate friend, you know--a really kindred spirit to whom I can confide my inmost soul. I've dreamed of meeting her all my life. I never really supposed I would, but so many of my loveliest dreams have come true all at once that perhaps this one will too. Do you think it's possible?" [Anne of Green Gables, Chapter VIII]

I guess it's more my desire to be somebody else's bosom friend. That's probably my selfishness rearing its head again. But I console myself in knowing I have found perhaps the most important bosom friend, the man I love.

Big Sister

Today, I made something to help Haleigh. Mom came in after Haleigh told her about it and hugged me and said, "Thank you for being such a good big sister."

Honestly, I've never really thought of myself as a big sister, much less a good one. The big sisters in our family were always Jaime and Megan, and Haleigh and I are the little sisters. But things have been very different without the "big sisters" home anymore, and I've grown to be very grateful that I wasn't the oldest (I'm not firstborn material).

And honestly, for the vast majority of my life, I was awful to Haleigh. We fought all the time. I always had to get the last word in. I had to comment after everything she did that I thought was ridiculous (which was most things). She was so different than me I didn't want to be associated with her.

I've been working on it though. And I think we've both grown up the past few years. I wanted to do something to help Haleigh because I actually sat down and talked to Mom about her yesterday. She has a harder life than I knew, and I can be a big part in making it better for her.

So I'm trying. It's hard, sometimes she still disgusts me or just plucks my every nerve, but I love her. And I want to keep on being a good big sister for her. She's my only little sister.

EFY

To me, this picture sums up EFY. Do I remember what I was doing as I was caught in this ridiculous pose? No. I just remember that that night was a ton of fun. Some of the kids are participating with me, some are bored or looking at other groups. But those that put effort and love and heart into our group learned something, I know it. I know it because their involvement helped me learn something. Like it's ok to be crazy and I don't have to worry that I look stupid in this photograph, because I'm all in. I was 110% there. And when you were all in to EFY, great things happened. Not just great relationships or competitions, but great spiritual experiences, because you were all in to the Spirit.

Got the Message Yet?

I feel like that's what Heavenly Father's been saying to me lately. He's sent me many slaps in the face to say, "Just be patient already and keep waiting." Here's the slaps I've collected so far:


[Sung at EFY]

"Waiting can be hard. Children know it, and so do adults. We live in a world offering fast food, instant messaging, on-demand movies, and immediate answers to the most trivial or profound questions. We don't like to wait. Some even feel their blood pressure rise when their line at the grocery store moves slower than those around them.

Patience-- the ability to put our desires on hold for a time-- is a precious and rare virtue. We want what we want, and we want it now. Therefore, the very idea of patience may seem unpleasant and, at times, bitter.

Nevertheless, without patience, we cannot please God; we cannot become perfect. Indeed, patience is a purifying process that refines understanding, deepens happiness, focuses action, and offers hope for peace....

If children are every going to mature and reach their potential, they must learn to wait." - President Dieter F. Uchtdorf
[Excerpt Quoted in Ward Bulletin]

[Full Talk Read Separately at EFY}


[Heard at the Fabric Store in Minnesota}

Don't Mess With the Olympics

I thank my family for my perhaps abnormal giddiness about the Olympics. At my house, it's a big event. It's the only time we get our cable hooked up. (The cable company can never understand what we're doing.) We go on a family shopping trip and each choose our favorite snacks to eat during the Opening Ceremonies, which we all watch together, though I sometimes fall asleep through the Parade of Nations. Then, the rest of two weeks or 21 days or whatever it may be, the Olympics are on almost constantly in my house. Bedtimes are much more flexible and snacking in front of the TV is much more accepted.

So last week in my Political Science class, we were discussing how media sets the social agenda, and how most of the time the stories (no matter how lame) are about Americans, not other countries. Because Americans want to hear about Americans, because we're lame/patriotic like that. A girl directly behind me raised her hand and commented about how that was true, and it could be seen in NBC's recent coverage of the Winter Olympics. "They only talked about American athletes, and they never went indepth on any other competitors. Any events without a major American contender, they just didn't show."

DID. YOU. EVEN. WATCH. THEM????? Maybe you only thought they covered Americans because you yourself only chose to watch the main events with strong American contenders, personal-agenda-setter! I'll admit, Evan Lysacek, Lindsey Vonn, and Shaun White are as cool as cold milk, but I also saw plenty of coverage of events in which the closest American athlete was in 28th place. I watched Cross-Country Skiing, and was just as tuned in to the Norwegian, German, and Swedish medalists. I learned about the Ladies' Figure Skating winners and was touched by the story of Canadian Joannie Rochette's mother. NBC showed the stories of Tessa & Scott right alongside Meryl & Charlie in Ice Dancing. I teared up as they showed how Shen & Zhao came out of retirement to finally catch the one accolade that had eluded them.

I thought long before that PoliSci class that the coverage of the Olympics had always been sportsmanlike, inspiring, and illuminating of the very soul of humanity. So think what you may, Miss NBC Has a Political Agenda, but I love the Olympics, and I truly think they bring the whole world closer together in a few days of understanding. I hope I never become so apathetic towards the Olympic games!


Husband and Wife Ice Skating Pairs Team Hongbo Zhao & Xue Shen.

Need a Hopeless Romantic?

I have always secretly wondered what being a hopeless romantic meant. I thought it meant just that when you watch movies, you root for the couple that seems they'll never get together. I don't know if a hopeless romantic is what I am, but I do know this: I love love.

Need someone to hear your giddy ramblings about the best date ever you just went on? I'm your girl. Need someone to boast to about all your wedding preparations and plans? I'll be there. Need someone to root for you every step of the way and get almost as excited as you do? Look no further. Maybe it's just because I like happy, and I adore how love makes people so happy and giggly (ok, girls at least), but I think I love love. I love how it makes you feel all warm and sparkly inside, and how you always want to be smiling but you're afraid your face will hurt. I love how it makes you think positive thoughts every waking moment, and it fills your whole self with hope.

So... you should try it. (Hey, if you need a support group, wing(wo)man, or just an attentive listener, you know where to find me!)

Boys & Girls

I've always thought of males as the ones who objectify females. Their high expectations force women to conform to gender ideals and focus on beauty and the feminine virtues, right?

But don't women act the same way? Don't we call men hot or unattractive? And judge based on a never-ending list of characteristics like their height (or lack of it), face shape, nose size, body hair amount, eye color, body build, hand size, foot length, etc.? Don't we daily encourage the stereotypes of what makes a good or manly man?

My perception is that most men don't place the degree of importance on women's expectations as women do on men's... or if men do, they don't share or show their consternation about their lacking areas. Today in my sociology class a boy claimed girls' expectations of men have changed with the advent of Twilight. "Girls expect you to be good-looking like Edward or as totally ripped as Jacob." While I doubt this extreme is true, what do I know? Thankfully, I've never experienced manhood for myself. But sorry guys, for any objectifying I may have put you through.

10 Things Learned from Chicago O'Hare

The Scene: The night before I was to return home for Christmas Break, my parents called and warned me my hometown was expecting a big snowstorm the next day, and it was a possibility I would be stranded in Chicago if I took my flight from SLC. After I entered my shuttle to SLC, I got a call from United that my flight from Chicago to VA was canceled. I decided to still take my flight to Chicago, and try to get on the next flight home or to Raleigh NC, since we were to pick up Kurt the day after I returned, and then drive back to VA. I was moved from standby list to standby list the rest of Saturday night in Chicago, eventually took a shuttle to a hotel by the airport, and returned the next morning. After returning to O'Hare at 6:30 in the morning Sunday, I finally got the last spot on standby to Raleigh at 5:30 that night. Kurt's family picked me up from the airport, and we drove halfway to VA, where we were picked up by my family. Except it was a lot more complicated than that.

----------------------

1. Bring a surge protector in your carry-on.
2. Pack your movies in your carry-on.
3. Make friends with the people sitting around you; this way, you can leave momentarily without bringing all your stuff and losing your seat.
4. Grab a seat next to an electrical cord if you will need one ever in the future, even if it is totally occupied. This way you get a head start when those people move on.
5. People are really nice and willing to help if you ask.
6. When stuck in Paris with your flights canceled, take advantage and see the town.
7. Phones run out of batteries a lot quicker when you have to call people constantly.
8. Bring as few carry-ons as possible. Preferably not purses.
9. When around time for one of your standby flights to leave, do not be talking on the cellphone. Be paying attention, and sitting close enough to the screens so you can read your name.
10. Don't forget a pillow.

Matching Monday: Kristian

Kristian Brian Sims and I go way back. To this one time at the Cannon Center, where our mutual friend Sam invited him to sit with us one time. She knew him from a ward volleyball game.

Kristian and I have good times together. One time we went to eat at Legends. This is when I learned Kristian used to play the tuba. This made him about the coolest person ever in my eyes. I had a class later that evening, but I ended up skipping it so we could keep talking. So, my first college class skipping was because of Kristian! Great influence, right?

Another story I like to tell about Kristian is this one time when we were walking home from campus with Megan and Sam the Man, and it was really icy. I was in the back of our single file line going through a narrow path, and I slipped on the ice. I went to grab Kristian's elbow, but instead, his elbow whacked me in the face.

The day I met Kurt, Kurt called Kristian to ask him on a date. They scheduled a dinner at Brick Oven together, and we learned Kristian doesn't like flowers. For your future reference, the appropriate question to ask someone you've just met, is what their favorite flower is. I don't know why it was so hilarious at the time, but it was.

One time Kristian, Kurt, Becca, and I went bowling. (Note: I hate bowling.) But it was the most fun I've ever had bowling! We had dances for our bowling victories. And I may or may not have done really well at bowling, even though I made a big deal about hating it. I feel bad about that. After bowling, we went to Denny's, where Kurt and Kristian shared a drink together with two straws. It was really cute.

The last night of Winter '09 Finals, I was closing at the Testing Center, and had asked Kristian to walk me home. I called him, and he and Kurt came and walked me home. And then we all hung outside of Chipman for a while.

The last night of Winter '09 before I flew home, Kristian and I and Sam and Becca went outside to hang out one last time. We ended up sleeping outside. It was really cold. I still remember the jacket I was wearing. Then we woke up, and slept in our dorms for like half an hour, and then we went up to campus and he carried home the boxes I bought to pack for me.

Kristian and I have had some awkward times. But, as we discussed just this evening, we have moved passed them. We are totally comfortable with each other, and we know that nothing we say to each other could be offensive, so we crack on each other all the time. We usually understand each other so well. I really feel like he is my younger brother. A really sweet awesome younger brother who does great things for us like make fudge and invite us over. And he is my May birthday buddy.

Hurrah for Kristian! Thanks, bro. I'll miss you!!

Lame.

(Note: Please imagine that title in your head in that evil octupusy man's voice from
Monsters vs. Aliens.)

I feel one should freely admit when they have been lame. I have come to realize that doing so makes people more amenable to forgiving you. I mean, once you admit you're in the wrong, what else can they say but maybe, "yeah you are!" The steam's gone. No one can hate you anymore. It works like a charm.

Ok, so the admitting thing is really for me, so I can forgive myself. This blog is mostly for me, and I have neglected it. I have been lame about recording my life. Which is so totally awesome and needs to be recorded for future posterity, and for me when I forget. So one of my goals for this New Year is to be better and write more often with this blog. That doesn't mean you will have to become a more studious reader or anything, it's mostly for me. I want to look back someday and look at all the little things that happened in my life and smile, knowing they helped make me the person I am. As Kathleen Kelly says in You've Got Mail,

"All this nothing has meant more to me than so many somethings."

So here's to the nothings in life; the nothings that, in the end, add up to great somethings. I hope I can be better at recording these this year!

Happy 2010!!